On Being Afraid…

Fear is a pretty prevalent emotion in our society. Lots of talk about anxiety disorders and panic disorders. And that’s great, we should talk about it. I have anxiety disorder with a side of PTSD from a traumatic childhood that I never dealt with until recently. So, I know. I know.

I know how paralyzing fear and anxiety can be. I know about the self doubt, lack of self worth. The negativity you feel about yourself. The persistent and unexplainable uneasiness.

While there is positivity if you look for it, the negative sometimes seems to be more prevalent, no? And easier to believe.

And what is the basis of negativity? (In my opinion, anyway.)

It’s fear.

Fear is a natural emotion. It is important. Fear can steer you away from dangerous situations. It can tell you when something is wrong.

But isn’t is strange how much fear can keep us from doing the things we want to do?

While fear can keep us safe, it can keep us stuck. Stagnant. This is true from something as big as quitting your job and embarking on a better opportunity, or it can come in a simpler form, such as living a more creative life.

Because what if…

What if we just make a mess? What if we waste money? What will others think of what we create?

I’m not even going to pretend I don’t struggle with all these things.

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But if I let fear control my ability to be creative then my anxiety gets worse and then depression joins the club. And that’s just no fun at all. I can’t let those negative what-if’s effect me. Even when my self doubt and anxiety is kicked into overtime.

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A page i did in about 10 minutes .It doesn’t take very long to make a pretty mess.
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This page I did throughout the day. A few minutes here and there.

When this happens, I have to force myself, yes, sometimes I have to force myself, to take even as little as five minutes to just slap paint down onto paper. Usually five minutes will turn into ten and then ten will turn into twenty and before I realize it I’ve created something I love (or not) and I feel better than I did when I sat down. I count that as a win. I won against fear if only for a little bit that day.

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The more you do the things you’re most afraid of doing the more LIFE OPENS UP

Because staying stagnant in your fear and anxiety won’t get you anywhere.

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And just because for your listening pleasure…

 

5 thoughts on “On Being Afraid…

  1. Jenni thank you so much for sharing such a profound and beautiful post. I too have so many fears and sometimes fear wins and sometimes I break through it. I guess we have to just keep moving forward and push ourselves!! ❤️❤️❤️

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